Friday, October 18

This Thing Called Love...

It is my belief that every person alive is capable of loving something/someone, no matter our personal opinions/judgments of others. From personal experiences and some observations, there's an ongoing battle of WHAT love really is, HOW we should love, and WHO should be loved. Some say that WE ARE love; others believe that love is something that has to be cultivated before we can give or be it; yet and still there are others who do not freely give love because their understanding is that everyone doesn't deserve that exchange with them. 

Depending on how we are raised, the life we've lived, and where we're headed, the definition of love changes. On a surface level, it can also be understood that the kind of love we all deserve is one free from negativity. So why set a time limit on when we can give deep affection to others, especially when it causes them to have positive exchanges with others?

If that stigma disappeared, it is my belief that the act of love would occur more frequently. Instead we're told that we have to KNOW someone to love them. Know exactly what though? How much knowledge should we amass before we share pure emotion with others? We could spend everyday with someone for 10 years and STILL not know everything there is to know about them. On the other hand, I've spent months with some people and acquired more knowledge about them through intimate conversation/interaction than they've shared with people who've known them all their life. 

It doesn't really cost us anything to give another person love. Granted, not everyone will want to be loved by us for a multitude of reasons and as much as that might hurt our ego, it should be understood that everyone isn't going to like us enough to be vulnerable with us. If there is one thing I know, regardless of our style of love, it should NEVER be forced on each other because it won't feel or be viewed as something positive. It's my hope that we can get to a place of being comfortable enough to say "this isn't working" without retaliation because the feelings aren't mutual. It would keep us from wasting valuable time that could be spent on those who want to love/be loved by us, specifically.

When we effectively communicate, give people space and allow them their right to say what works for them and what doesn't, we create more room for healthy love. We'd get happier people and a byproduct of that is...more love being given and received. Positive exchanges of love don't rub us raw but actually have been known to heal parts of our souls and minds that have been damaged by negative experiences. The lack of love? I've grown to believe a lot of us have experienced this far more than we'd like and that's what makes this thing called love so difficult...

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