Pregnancy & The Public Eye

The above pictures are of me when I was 7 months pregnant and about 3 months before I found out I was with child. Nothing about my pregnancy was easy but my daughter was healthy the entire time I was pregnant. That made me so grateful and I took all the "punches" in stride. The comments about my body during pregnancy from women who had never been pregnant, as well as men who don't know shit about shit when it comes to pregnancy, used to piss me off. 

I was extremely emotional during this time and used to cry a lot when I was by myself. My hormones were all out of whack, I was stressed beyond belief, and couldn't stop counting the days until delivery. The judgments of others did not make this process any better so when I hear/see others calling other pregnant women rude ass names, a part of me taps back into my experience. 

My body changed SO much that I would get upset at what I was seeing in the mirror, more often than not. I was used to my butt looking a certain way; my rear end was ALL OVER THE GOTDAM PLACE. My boobs looked fantastic but were so heavy that I couldn't really appreciate them as much as other mothers. My [now] husband was so concerned about poking his daughter in the head while having sex that I didn't get it in as much as I would have liked to. Another contributing factor to my crankiness while pregnant. When I say that EVERYTHING changed JUST to bring my daughter into this world, I am so serious.

I didn't really talk to many people about my feelings while pregnant. I was experiencing things I never acknowledged in the past and I felt alone during this process, most days. I had a couple friends that (figuratively) held my hand through it all and I love them SO much for being there. I often wonder how some women who are in the public eye deal with this because we all know how insensitive people can be towards the famous. 

                                    

I heard/saw people calling Mariah everything from a "fat fuck" to "Shamu" when she was pregnant. Never mind that she was carrying twins and it's expected amongst people with functioning brains that she was going to gain a considerable amount of weight.

Kim Kardashian has also been called Shamu, as well as "a big bitch" and "overweight". Of course because she is the world's favorite person to gossip about and hate, she's rarely spared when it comes to name calling.

                                                  

Some even questioned whether Jill Scott was really pregnant or just "ridiculously obese". Due to her already being a plus size woman, pre-pregnancy, the jokes were endless and...cruel. It got to the point where I began to question if people valued a healthy mother or seemingly thinner expecting mothers.

I could keep posting pre-pregnancy and pregnancy pictures of women in the spotlight, listing the irrational comments that were made about them. It would only further support my point that the general public can sometimes be mindless as a box of rocks. It caused me to question how many women accepted what happens when you get the opportunity to create life. Some of these same women are eagerly awaiting the day they get to have a family of their own but the level of their immaturity is astounding. 

My only suggestion to the public is to be easy on moms-to-be. They are dealing with enough preparing for the arrival of their tiny bundle[s]. While they might be used to ignoring the mean things people hurl their way, some of us women who are used to looking a certain way, still have to manage our feelings regarding pregnancy. I guess what I'm trying to say is, stop being dickheads about pregnant women. Yes, some of us gain a ton of weight while pregnant, our noses might spread all over our face, and it could look like we're about to give birth to Paul Bunyan. However, if you've never carried a baby past 3-4 months, shut the entire fuck up. It's a process of up to 9 months. Respect this miracle or just be quiet.

Do You REALLY Care What Kanye & Kim are Doing?

Due to the gossipy world we live in, if you have the slightest modicum of fame, the public [media included] will insert themselves into every facet of your life, if possible. There was a time when news was broadcast in an effort to inform us of things that we needed to know. Today? Not so much. It appears that people are far more interested in who's sleeping with who versus things that really matter.

I clicked on a Huffington Post link that said "Kim & Kanye Posing Nude on L'Official Hommes Paris Spring 2013", thinking it was going to be a spread of tasteful photos from the couple. Wrong. The write-up had more to do with admonishing them for taking the pictures.

"...doing a hell of a job making sure their future child will one day have plenty to be embarrassed about"

"the reality star and her rapper baby daddy"

"we'll admit the cover is pretty sexy, but we're calling TMI on this as we have their unborn baby's best interest at heart, and no one wants to see their parents like that"

The focus wasn't on the photos that were taken, in fact, there was only one pose repeatedly shown on the post and that was it. The writer made sure you were paying attention to their opinion related drivel that reflected more of their personal beliefs than a genuine interest in the couple's unborn child. Makes me wonder if they stopped to think that maybe it isn't within the unborn child's interest to write foolish shit about their parents.

As far as "no one wants to see their parents like that", I'm positive there are people out there who thought the picture was beautiful, not an embarrassment, present or future. If children see their parents expressing love for one another openly, wouldn't that provide a good example? I suppose it is the general assumption that they'll raise their child traditionally and in a conservative manner. If they choose to do that, good for them. It is the choosing otherwise that causes people to cast these ridiculous judgments.

I can show you several families who raised their children conservatively, in a traditional manner...and the kids didn't take to their parents instructions too well. The same goes for non-traditional parenting. You can find examples of good and bad outcomes for any type of child rearing.

I digress. Whatever happened to just wishing people well? Instead we've become a society that has to tear EVERYTHING apart to feel better about ourselves. I would say if Kim & Kanye were your friends, would you look at them the same but the answer is made clear everyday. A lot of people cannot stomach the happiness of others when they aren't in a happy place themselves. While it is understandable, the negativity attached to it oozes out a lot more frequently than some of us are willing to admit.

The Huffington Post more than likely got tons of hits and that is what they're always aiming for. It just makes me a bit sad that news has to be presented in this manner. 

I'm not Kim and my husband isn't Kanye but we're not strangers to people saying inappropriate things about our relationship. It is almost like the free-spirited, carefree individuals will forever be looked down upon by those too afraid to embrace their right to do as they please. Kayne & Kim have dated some well-known people. Kanye doesn't get crowned a hobag, as does Kim, even though their situations have been similar. They've actually been in relationships with these people, it's just been broadcast in an ugly light all over the media. 

How many people can honestly say the last 5 people they've slept with, they were FOR REAL dating? I'm sure someone can but why does it even matter? Will that add on to the years of productive life you have left? Nope but shitting on other people has become the cool thing to do. I'm hoping that news outlets get back to reporting things in a journalistic manner that can still be admired. The public complains about the messages that the media constantly send that are negative but the truth is...they wouldn't keep posting it if there wasn't a significant following looking at and sharing it.

I guess it all goes back to being the change we wish to see.