Friday, February 8

Choosing to Be Nice vs. Repulsive

I have a friend who acts amazed that I'm friendly to people I don't need to be nice to. We're in our 5th year of friendship and this still makes her laugh at me. It makes me no never mind. I'm not nice to get anything out of anyone. It just comes natural to me to be cheerful, kind, and smile. If someone else [not speaking of my friend] is bothered by this, THAT makes ME laugh. 

Why are you annoyed that someone else prefers to be pleasant than being a crotchety cunt? You do realize how moronic that is, considering positivity isn't a bad thing?

Some of the misconceptions I often hear attached to those who have a pleasant demeanor are as follows:
  • they aren't really happy/nice
I understand that there are Happiness Impostors out there. I get it. However, if some of us brainy farts are as intelligent as we lead on, it should be understood that ALL people aren't faking the funk. If you genuinely take comfort in being a grouchy asshole, why does the possibility of someone enjoying the polite life, seem far fetched? I attribute that to the pessimism instinctively connected to being mean all the time. Of course, this is no different than a happy person assuming a miserable person doesn't want to be down all the time. I used to think like that because of how draining it is [to me] to revel in melancholy. Good old logic and life has shown, some people DO bask in the darkness of their sadness. THAT is what makes them feel alive and there is NOTHING anyone else can do about it. So, leave them alone and let them be who they want.
  • they're only being nice because they want something
I understand that there are Wolves in Sheep Clothing, waiting to use other peoples kindness as a weakness. The best line of reasoning I can assign this notion is simply asking the accuser, "are YOU one of the wolves?" If the answer is "Yes", with a wicked smile that makes you feel like you are their next victim, flee. Unless you're a glutton for punishment. If the answer is "No" in a slightly offended tone, they've pretty much given credit to the fact that everyone isn't out to take advantage of others.
  • they're attention whores and need friends
So you would assume, without knowing anything about someone, that they need friends? Maybe, it is you who needs a friend. Revel in your angst all you like but while it is true that there are other Mopey Mandy's and Evil Eddie's, people do exist who are the complete opposite. Consider this for a second...some people draw others to them BECAUSE they're enjoyable to be around. If you aren't familiar with this and don't care to be, it's your world, do you. Aldous Huxley stated that "facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored". It is factual that everyone doesn't behave the same.
  • they're idiots, gullible, stupid, [insert some more intended insults thrown out to make them feel better about their assumptions]
When did it become idiotic and stupid to be kind? I suppose if you've been fucked over a lot in life, it makes sense that this ideal would be adopted. It's understandable that you wouldn't want this to happen to you and definitely not repeatedly. Listen to yourself though. To indicate that you aren't nice because all it does is get you taken advantage of says more than you're willing to admit. At some point, you wanted to be nice to others too, you just CHOSE to do the opposite. This is a defense mechanism, not necessarily how you've always viewed things. You successfully shoot holes in your own assumption [theory]. Being hurt sometimes makes us keep our patronus out permanently to deflect other assholes from approaching. I get that too. That's your baggage speaking for you, not a universal truth.

It should be understood that no one is so one-dimensional that they never exude traits opposite of how we usually see them behave. Meaning, even the nicest person has Mean Girl days, just as Cuntastic individuals have breakthroughs where they like someone enough to get married, have kids, and actually show they can love something other than their evil misery. It happens because we're human.

So even though my friend chuckles at my cheery disposition, she's well aware that I can rip someones head off and spit down their throat. Without blinking once. If you want to be a mean ass, by all means, soak up all the assholery. Those who want to sniff unicorn ass, taste the rainbow, and giggle more than scowling like we bit a lemon? Let them live the sweet life.

You can always take comfort in the fact that one more happy person leaves more room for you to be a dick about life.


  1. I love your mind. This is why we're friends. I'm taking notes! I told you that you inspire me to be a better person! :)

  2. My sister is the nice person I always make fun of, since I am that cunt-tastic individual of which you speak. If only she could have phrased her position as well as you have written herein, maybe I wouldn't have been such a bitch toward her. I am sending this her way, in hopes of a reconciliation... so THANKS for making me better understand the nice-guy (gal) perspective! :)

  3. Kenya Mack: thank you love! :-) <3

    Andi-Roo: LOL I used such colorful words to describe the "unhappy" mainly because of how nice people are talked down on for no logical reason other than they're not typically mean. I don't know you well enough to know if you're being sarcastic or not; if you are, good one. If you're not, glad you're open to other perspectives :-)


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